Rest in peace Paula ~ my beautiful and courageous sister-in-law

Early this morning my sister-in law Paula passed away :(  

Paula, you have been a pillar of strength and example to so many. Your amazing service to others, while you have gone through your own pain and suffering has been an inspiration to us all. I'm so thankful for your friendship and everything you taught me. Now, you are free of pain and suffering and in the arms of the Lord.  He has you in his arms and I will have you forever in my heart. This morning my husband saw a butterfly on the window and it sat there a long time. We both felt that is was his sister Paula saying goodbye.  This is one of the songs she chose for her funeral and just like the song says, her soul flew away early in the morning.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1BPoMIQHwpo

September is Sadness

My sister-in-law Paula has been in the hospital for 2 weeks.  After a ten year battle with breast cancer she is now in stage 4. She was rushed to ER when her femur broke because her bones are so brittle from bone builder medicine.  This is one of the side effects, brittle bones. My husband and I have been visiting with her on the weekends, staying the whole day. Paula turned 41 on August 5th. It's so sad because she has helped so many people but no one can help her but to pray for a healing miracle.  Her eyes are yellow as the cancer has spread to the liver and kidneys.  They moved her to the hospice floor. We continue to pray for a miracle.

Last varicella injection

I went for my second varicella injection this morning.  Now just one more month before we can start ttcing again.  I am feeling confident that the acupuncture and new vitamins are going to make a big difference.   Can't get Eric to exercise with me but we go for walks.  I do pilates and fertility yoga.  I still haven't convinced him to get acupuncture treatments yet but I am working on it!

*Update: Eric started acupuncture with me  September 2nd! He likes and trusts the doctor :) I am thrilled!

Acupuncture

Today I went to my second acupuncture treatment and my doctor is so nice.  When he started talking about bbt charting and opk's I was so happy because I had been doing that before ivf and the fertility doctor wasnt interested.  This doctor said that acupuncture increases the chance of conception form 20% to 40%.  That was music to my ears.  Since he is also an herbalist I asked him to recommend some chinese herbs and so I am ordering "womens treasure".  I had the varicella injection so after the second shot I can start the herbal supplements.  Hubby has started taking Fertility blend.

BFN :(

Ivf was unsuccessful.  I was kind of expecting it because last Thursday I had some spotting and my bbt temperature dropped.  I am very sad because I had such hope when the fertility doctor said I was doing really well when I was going for daily ultrasounds during stims.  After the "I'm so sorry but your test was negative" call from the nurse, Doctor McClamrock also phoned me.  He was already talking about round #2 but I said I needed to take a break.  I am going to try acupuncture treatments.  I will not be defeated and I am for sure not giving up.  I have my first acupuncture appointment July 5th.

U2 concert in Baltimore

We have had tickets for the U2 concert for 8 months and I am so excited it is tonight!!  I have no pregnancy symptoms and my bbt temperature dropped yesterday from 99.9 to 98.4.  Today it was 98.6 but I am still preparing myself for a possible disappointment this Monday which is my beta pregnancy test.  Wouldn't it be awesome if this cycle was successful and our baby would be attending his/her first concert? Tonight my husband and I are going to have a blast at U2! Can't wait!

Keeping hopeful during the 2 week wait

6dpt today.  The progesterone is causing morning sickness, sore and swollen breasts, pinching in my ovaries and sleepiness. There is no way of knowing until the beta pregnancy test on June 27th.  I have been keeping busy taking care of my garden and crocheting.  I made a cute newborn size yellow baby booties and beanie following a tutorial on Youtube.  The day before my egg retrieval I planted 6 Jack-o lantern pumpkin seeds and 7 Bajan pumpkin seeds.  I remember thinking that day that even if IVF didnt work, watching the little pumpkin plants grow would be encouraging.  All 13 of them are growing :)

My nurse phoned on the 17th to say that the 3rd embryo didn't make it to freeze.  I am praying that the 2 in my uterus are doing well.  My husband bought me a pineapple on Friday night and a have been eating it (including the core).  It's full of bromelain and helps with implantation. I have been eating lots of fruits and vegetables.  This week I have been eating at least 6 servings a day of strawberries, raspberries, sweet cherries, blueberries, apples and papaya.  I eat them fresh and in smoothies. Tonight we are going to the cinema to see Xmen: First class.  Lord please give me the patience to get through these next 8 days.

Transfer-Day 3

Well the embryos this morning were 5-cell, 3-cell and the 3rd the doctor didnt say.   He said he didn't know if it would make it to freeze.  They are all poor quality.  Yesterday they were perfect so I don't know what happened.  I wish my doctor had been available today.  The doctor who did my transfer was 45 minutes late and with a full bladder every minute counts...He seemed to be one of those people that hates Monday and had  nothing encouraging to say. He said they were poor quality. He then transferred two embryos and sent the 3rd with the embryologist.  I hope it makes it to freeze.  I stayed in bed all day.  Sleeping passed a good few hours.  I was happy when my husband came home from work.  He was bearing gifts of GF orange chicken and seaweed salad.  I am giving it all over to God's as it's in his hands now.

Embryo Growth-Day 2

The embryologist had great news this morning...Our 3 embryos are doing very well. :)  One is 4-cell and the other two are 2-cell.  They are exactly where they are supposed to be. The 4-cell is the stronger one.  Transfer is tomorrow at 9am!  My husband and I thanked God for his blessings.  Our friend Mike was baptized today and we were there to share it with him. It was truly a joyful day.  We enjoyed a picnic at the Samaritan Women.  Then we took a tour and after there was a thunderstom and the rain came down; a blessing from heaven!

Fertilization-Day 1

This is our first IVF cycle.  Yesterday, June 10th was Retrieval day and it went very well. Doctor said he was able to get 10 mature eggs.  This morning I received a phone call at 8 am.  Only 3 embryos fertilized normally.  ICSI fractured some of the eggs so I wish now that I had refused this procedure.  Maybe they would have done better left to fertilize naturally.  Can't think of what ifs now.  I praise God for blessing us with wonderful medical coverage. My husband and I are praying that the 3 embryos make it till Monday for transfer.  With God all things are possible!